Why We Stink At Communicating

You talkin’ to me?!

There are a zillion books written about communication skills. Why? Don’t we know how to talk to one another by now? The answer seems to be a resounding “No.”

Despite record amounts of visits to therapists, psychologists, psychiatrists, marriage counselors, corporate coaches, and guidance counselors, our society, one that communicates 24-7 for pleasure, business, or necessity, sucks at the art of communicating.

We each believe the problem rests with the other side. We each think we communicate clearly, often, and pleasantly. The truth is it takes two for a proper conversation to take place but few of us have exchanges that go off as intended or as well as we think they did.

What’s the root cause to this problem that invades the workplace, bedroom, or the line at McDonald’s? The world moves too fast for us to keep up. Our communications have decreased in quality, in proportion to our reliance on technological tools. But we can’t blame busy lives and Twitter for failing at communicating, though they play significant factors.

Let’s look at 10 reasons why we may not be so successful at conveying our intentions, ideas, needs, desires, and concerns:

1.      Communication requires that we listen to one another. Now more than ever, we talk at each other and no one listens. Just look at our use of social media - we make announcements and send out a lot of information but are we participating in a give-and-take dialog?

2.      Depending on our emotional state and mood, we may not come off as polite as we should -- nor may we be in a state of mind to give people the benefit of the doubt in an exchange of words.

3.      Time is a factor. We scamper through things, not fully reading an email or paying attention to what one says to us. Further, we rush what we have to say to another, perhaps at the expense of important details.

4.      Some people are just too sensitive. Stop being so sensitive! Sometimes people tell a joke or make a mistake or really didn’t mean the way something sounded. Get over it.

5.      Be aware of your position in the relationship and the setting in which you communicate. For instance, you’d talk differently to a 4-year-old than you would a 14-year-old and you’d talk differently to a colleague versus a boss versus a client versus a spouse versus your mom -- right? And you act one way privately, another in the public, do you not? Just be aware of the boundaries and demands of the situation you communicate under.

6.      When you screw up, apologize. Why bother arguing?

7.      We all use email buy sometimes a phone call will save you lots of problems. Even better, use face-to-face meetings to inject some personal humanity into the conversation.

8.      Try to be aware of the needs, expectations, desires, concerns, fears and mental state of the person you are communicating with. You become a better communicator when you assume what it feels like to be them.

9.      Some crappy communication happens due to cultural differences. You are not speaking the same language even if you think you are. Body language, cultural references, personal values and one’s experiences play a role in how we convey or interpret an idea or state of mind. It’s easy to misinterpret or misread another -- or to make wrongful assumptions.

10.  We are limited by our diversified experiences, education and knowledge. The less common ground we have, the more likely a conflict arises.

You know, we can all go on and on to make this list 100+ reasons-long on why we fail to communicate. I can’t tell you how often someone mistreats another because they clouded their judgment with preconceived notions or misperceptions. I also can’t tell you how often my wife and I think we each said the opposite thing when we shout directives from one floor of our house to the other. It happens -- whether you love, or hate someone -- that communicating with them can have many hurdles.

The key is to minimize the number of misfires and to mitigate the level of miscommunication. Its one thing to think someone didn’t hear you, or misheard you; it’s another to think the person ignored you or said something negative.

Do your best to improve the two-way street of communication, but be prepared to accept some potholes on every corner.

Interview With Author Rhys Bowen

1. What type of books do you write? I write historical mysteries. Two series, The Molly Murphy mysteries, set in early 1900s New York City and featuring an Irish immigrant sleuth and The Royal Spyness books, a lighter series about a member of the royal family in 1930s England. My books have made the New York Times bestseller list and won many awards.
 

2. What is your latest or upcoming book about? My latest book in the Molly Murphy series came out in March. It's called HUSH NOW, DON'T YOU CRY, and the story takes place in the "cottages" in Newport Rhode Island. A powerful Irishman has summoned his family to the cottage in October, hopelessly out of season, and invited Molly's husband, police captain Daniel Sullivan, to be there are the same time. They arrive in a thunderstorm and the lightning illuminates a child's face in an upstairs window. But it seems there is no child in the house. A sense of foreboding, a feeling that the house is haunted, hangs over Molly. Then the homeowner is found sprawled at the foot of a cliff. Why had he summoned his family? What had he wanted to tell them? And whose face had Molly seen? 

3. What inspired you to write it? I felt like writing a story with a gothic feel to it. It's the eleventh book in the series and I like to take Molly out of New York sometimes. It was interesting to focus on an Irishman who has been very successful for a change.
 

4. What did you do before you became an author? Grew up. Went to school.  I've been writing professionally since I sold my first short story at 16. But I did work in BBC drama after college, before writing my own radio and TV plays.
 

5. How does it feel to be a published author? Any advice for struggling writers? I have written many books in different genres all my life but I still get a thrill when I spot one of my books on a shelf, or better yet, in an airport! Struggling writers? Know what you are writing. Study what those already published in the genre are writing. Read a lot. Then write the best book you can. Don't ever write what you think will be a best seller. Trends come and go quickly. Good literature endures. 

6. Where do you see book publishing heading? We're in an interesting time and a worrying one too. Self publishing is now a viable option for writers. This is terrific in many ways but also concerning. A self published book on Amazon hasn't gone through the layers of editing and vetting that a traditionally published writer has to go through. Some of them are really poor quality and may well turn off potential readers. I'm not sure where this will end up. Will it mean the end of publishing as we know it? Perhaps. The end of paper books? There is already a huge shift. A year ago my e-book sales were about one tenth of my total sales. Now they are close to half.

What Advice Would I Give A Struggling Writer?

by Writer and Illustrator Gary Raham

Author of 17 titles of science fact and/or science fiction

Former Co-Regional Advisor for SCBWI, Rocky Mountain Region

www.biostration.com

rgaryraham@blogspot.com

1.)  Enjoy the process

Make sure that crafting words and telling compelling stories matters to you. Realize that this enjoyment has to be self-fulfilling, because you may or may not reach a receptive audience in your lifetime. If you are compelled to write, place that task at the top of your to-do list. Carve out a few minutes daily, a few hours weekly and write.

2.)  Find your peers and share

Find or build a group of writers sympathetic to your writing passion at approximately your skill level and share your work. Everybody learns; everybody feels the pain—and also gets some strokes. Also, find local writer’s networks of a larger size that can provide more training and opportunities to share. (Examples: The Society of Children’s Book Writers and Illustrators [SCBWI], Science Fiction Writers & Illustrators of America [SFWA], etc.) Volunteer your skills and talents and make connections. This can be hard for the focused introverts among you, but valuable.

3.)  Know your craft and stretch yourself

Daily writing and networking will place you in the path of onrushing opportunity. Make sure that the quality of your skills is sharp and ready for any sudden collisions with recognition and publication. Survival and success after impact will largely depend on the strength of your talent, preparation, and determination. Once you experience a measure of success, stretch yourself. Reacquaint yourself with that original joy in the process of learning to wield the power and beauty of language in new and different ways.

RECENT BLOG POSTS

Magazine Reading Shifts  From Newsstand To Digital

http://bookmarketingbuzzblog.blogspot.com/2012/08/magazine-newsstand-decline-follows-that.html

Whatever Happened To Free Speech?

http://bookmarketingbuzzblog.blogspot.com/2012/08/whatever-happened-to-free-speech.html

Batman Shows One Good Story Is All That You Need

http://bookmarketingbuzzblog.blogspot.com/2012/08/batman-shows-that-one-good-story-is-all.html

Twitter Fatigue

http://bookmarketingbuzzblog.blogspot.com/2012/08/twitter-fatigue.html

Vacations Mean Lots Of Reading

http://bookmarketingbuzzblog.blogspot.com/2012/08/vacations-mean-lots-of-reading.html

Imagine: An Author Lied

http://bookmarketingbuzzblog.blogspot.com/2012/08/imagine-author-lied.html

Wal-Mart Doubles Book Sales At Books-A-Million

http://www.bookmarketingbuzzblog.blogspot.com/2012/08/wal-mart-rises-to-become-4th-biggest.html

Book Publishing Olympics Are Needed

http://bookmarketingbuzzblog.blogspot.com/2012/08/book-publishing-olympics-are-needed.html

Book Marketing With Social Media

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Brian Feinblum’s views, opinions, and ideas expressed in this blog are his alone and not that of his employer, the nation’s largest book promoter. You can follow him on Twitter @theprexpert and email him at brianfeinblum@gmail.com. He feels more important when discussed in the third-person.

Magazine Newsstand Decline Follows That Of Newspapers & Books

It's no secret that printed publications are decreasing in popularity. But the speed at which it is happening is accelerating.

Newstand sales of single issues -- big moneymakers for publishers -- are down 9.6 percent across the board compared to last year. Somes sales are going to the digital world, while others are just disappearing.  According to the Audit Bureau of Circulation, digital subscriptions are up by over 150% but the 5.4 million e-subscriptions olnly represents 1.7% of the marketplace. Last year it made up 1% of the market, so the growth rate is fast. As more iPads and tablets flood consumers, we'll likely see a bigger migration from print to digital. However, one important note, overall paid and verified circulation was only down .1 percent from last year, so people have not lost interest in magazines.

The top 10 digtized magazines are:

1. Game Informer
2. Maxim
3. Cosmopolitan
4. Poder Hispanic
5. National Geographic
6. Popular Science
7. O
8. ESPN
9. The Magazine
10. Parenting

Interview With Author Mike Jeffries 

1. What type of books do you write? I write non-fiction books; primarily about children, divorce and parental alienation -- a very destructive family dynamic affecting countless children, parents and extended family members every year.  There isn't a lot of information out there about parental alienation so my efforts hopefully fill a void and help families dealing with some very painful situations.

2. What is your latest or upcoming book about? I'm actually taking a break from my usual topic and collaborating with a colleague on a book about the communication skills needed to excel in the corporate environment.  So often people are promoted into managerial positions based on their technical expertise, but they have no formal training in how to communicate effectively with their people.  Good communication skills -- including writing, presentations, conflict resolutions and one-one-one or small group feedback sessions -- are the keys to engaging people and helping both the individuals and the organization succeed.  

3. What inspired you to write it? Very simply, we identified a need.  We ran a very successful communication training program designed to help managers improve their communication and leadership skills.  The program was so successful we decided to turn it into a book.  This opportunity couldn't be more different from the events the led me to write A Family's Heartbreak: A Parent's Introduction to Parental Alienation.  In that case there was both a need in the marketplace and an opportunity to deal with my own pain over losing my son to parental alienation.

4. What did you do before you became an author? I've been writing professionally for more than 30 years.  I started writing radio news and sports stories in Washington D.C., and then wrote freelance articles for newspapers and magazines.  These days the majority of my writing takes place in the corporate world.  I write speeches for CEOs, corporate video scripts, blogs, announcements, press releases and marketing materials.  Writing isn't all I do but it's a big part of it.

5. How does it feel to be a published author? Being a published author is extremely gratifying.   I hear from people all over the world who just want to say "thank you" to me for sharing my story and a little information.  Whenever we sell a book in Australia, South Africa, England, Israel or any of the other far away places where we've sold books, I remember writing A Family's Heartbreak in this dumpy little apartment I was forced to rent after my divorce.   I can't believe the words I wrote in that apartment are traveling around the world and touching people.

6. Any advice for struggling writers? Write what you know about and write with passion.  

7. Where do you see book publishing heading? Clearly, the marketplace is evolving.  I think there will always be people who want to hold a book in their hands and put it on a shelf when they've finished it, but their numbers are dwindling and authors and publishers need to adjust their expectations when it comes to sales, revenues and profits.  I also think the internet, and blogs in particular, are providing an outlet for authors to develop their ideas and skills.  Much like the entertainment industry makes "straight to video" movies I think we'll see more and more "straight to online" books by authors and bloggers.  

For more information, please see www.afamilysheartbreak.com.

Brian Feinblum’s views, opinions, and ideas expressed in this blog are his alone and not that of his employer, the nation’s largest book promoter. You can follow him on Twitter @theprexpert and email him at brianfeinblum@gmail.com. He feels more important when discussed in the third-person.

Whatever Happened To Free Speech?

In case you have not noticed, social media – mainly Twitter – has exposed a real hole in the notion that one can write or say what they want. The price may not be jail or a government beat-down, but it is steep.

Just look at two Olympians – one from Greece, the other from Switzerland. These two were banned from participating in the XXX Summer Olympics because of racially insensitive remarks posted on Twitter right at the onset of the international competition.

Now, I certainly do not want to defend racists or their remarks, but there are different ways to handle such people. Did these athletes use poor judgment to say what they think, knowing many would not look fondly upon such comments? Yes. Would most agree their statements were in fact racist and showed ignorance? Yes. But should the penalty be that they cannot play in a sporting event that they may never have a chance to play in ever again? And should their nation’s team also be dealt a penalty (by virtue of the player bans) for something they didn’t do – and that isn’t sports related. If these players were arrested for something – domestic dispute, speeding, even robbery, they wouldn’t be kicked out of the Olympics. Yes, for speaking their minds, they are annexed.

I don’t think so. The issue is more than the Olympics. What is at stake is free speech itself.

True free speech is protected at all levels.  It is one thing if a corporation chooses not to sponsor an athlete because of such remarks, it is another to ban someone from a sporting competition. I get it that no one wants to associate with a racist (except maybe other racists), but just because someone makes us uncomfortable or says an opposing viewpoint does that mean an entity can have the authority to throw you off a team, kick you out of school or fire you from your job? It appears the answer is yes.  But how far do we let this go? What if an athlete said he doesn’t like Obama and ridicules the president? Or an athlete vehemently disagrees with legislation pending in Congress? When it came to Chick-fil-A’s CEO making comments about opposing gay marriage his stores received a showing of support from customers who think the same way. So in certain cases is sounding racist or homophobic to be embraced?

I don’t know about you, but I think athletes, though they need to abide by the law, follow their sport’s rules, and to act with the appearance of being model citizens, should not be held accountable for what they say when the speech has nothing to do with their sport. Actions are one thing; but words are not actions when it comes to expressing a viewpoint.

Do I want a racist representing America? No, but you know what, just because someone disagrees with my views or lifestyle should not play any relevance when scoring who is the best athlete in their sport. The Games are meaningful because they have the best athletes, not the near-best athletes with PC-scrubbed resumes. I am sure not all of the thousands of athletes at the Games are good, clean, anti-racist individuals. I am sure some are wife-beaters, alcoholics, haters, and worse. If we find out after the Games that an athlete said or even did bad things in their lives, will we take their medals away?

We can’t go back and change history - -nor should we. Ty Cobb was one of the best baseball players of his era and he is in the Hall of Fame. But he was a vehement racist. So be it. Sports cannot judge morality – it can only concern itself with what happens on the field of competition.

Don’t get me wrong. Character counts. And I suppose there are other ways to counter racist tweets without punishing the sport, the team, or even the athlete. We need to promote a positive, inclusive, peaceful, loving world but we cannot force someone to be good, to think a certain way, to say certain things, or to be a nice person. But we can encourage these things.

I want to see free speech live at the expense not of sports competitions but rather our ability to tolerate such things. As a society, we can rebuke offensive comments but we run amok when we overstep boundaries and exact too high of a price on both sports and society.

Free speech is not only costing those athletes, but all of us. To support their banishment is to give all governments the green light to suppress the views of those that are seen as unpopular, or just different. If we don’t watch it, that Olympic flame may end up burning the freedom to speak our minds, even if what is said is mindless or insulting.

Interview With Author Farin Powell

1. What type of books do you write? I write fictions, mostly about relationships. 

2. What is your latest or upcoming book about? My recent novel, Two Weddings is about the strong bond between a mother and her daughter; a bond that cannot be severed even after the mother's death. Catherine, my protagonist befriends an angel in Heaven and watches what happens to her children on earth. Catherine is more worried about her daughter, Sarah, a wedding planner, a widow, and a single mother who seems to have lost her way. With the help of her angel friend, Catherine finds a husband for Sarah.

3. What inspired you to write it? When my mother died ten years ago, I thought that was the end of a very strong mother-daughter relationship. But I was wrong. She came to my dreams every night. That was comforting during my grieving period, but at the same time, it was scary. She knew everything that was happening to me. My novel is of course a work of fiction about Sarah, a wedding planner who lives in San Francisco. But Sarah's mother Catherine is very much like my mother.

4. What did you do before you became an author? I was and I still am an attorney. I have a long list of legal publications in many prestigious law reviews and law journals. However, I did not become a writer recently. I was a poet since age ten. I worked as a part-time reporter for two magazines and published three short stories before I turned 20. I changed my practice in 2010 to appellate work, and focused more on my writing. I have two more novels which I'm hoping to publish in 2012, and 2013.

5. How does it feel to be a published author? Any advice for struggling writers?  It's a good feeling that you have finished a big project. To me, it doesn't matter that my book is not on the best seller's list. Even if I have touched 100 people, that's good enough for me. The radio show hostess who interviewed me, and the feed back I get during book club events (please seewww.farinpowell.com, facebook, twitter) prove to me that many people have experienced what my characters had gone through. I'm a struggling writer myself. I don't have time to find an agent, or to blog. But, I will not give up. If you have a good story to tell, don't give up.

6. Where do you see book publishing heading? The traditional book publishing will continue. There are people who love to hold their books in their hands. However, one cannot ignore the success of the e-book authors and publishers.

For more information, please see www.farinpowell.com.

Interview With Author David Perlstein

1.      What type of books do you write? I write novels now, but my first published book was about business and my second about the Hebrew Bible. I’d been a freelance copywriter for many years and saw how most freelancers, no matter how talented, struggled. So I literally wrote the book on managing the business side. In 1998, Crown (New York) published Solo Success: 100 Tips for Becoming a $100,000-a-Year Freelancer. I received thank-you emails from around the world—a great reward because few books make real money. At that time I started researching a non-fiction book, God’s Others: Non-Israelites’ Encounters With God in the Hebrew Bible. It ended up being a twelve-year project and a fabulous experience. But I had no platform—I wasn’t a rabbi, academic or journalist. So I published God’s Others independently through iUniverse, which made it available at their online bookstore, as well as through Amazon and barnesandnoble.com.

2.      What is your novel about? Slick!—also published through iUniverse—is a geopolitical satire set in a fictional Persian-Gulf sultanate, Moq’tar. Satire is serious business, and Slick! gave me a chance not only to tell an entertaining story—a power struggle between two brothers and attempts on the life of the protagonist—but also shine a spotlight on instability and betrayal in the Middle East, as well as the follies of hyper-capitalism and American foreign policy. This fall, I’ll bring out a follow-up set in Central America. And I’m about to begin the agent search for a third novel. It’s different, involving a father and adult son living in the same house but estranged. Death is a major focus. So is stand-up comedy. As part of my research, I took a course on comedy and performed at open mics. And I’m about to begin a fourth novel—a Huckleberry Finn-like adventure set in 1980.

3.      What inspired you to write Slick!? Life. I certainly was motivated by the nation’s unfortunate adventure in Iraq—and I say this as a former Army officer who thinks highly of our military. Why satire? Because stretching characters and situations within a good story not only entertains but also communicates. The protagonist of Slick!, Bobby Gatling, represents all of us suddenly having our eyes opened by unfolding events. Employed by a military/security contractor, Bobby’s a retired U.S. Army officer (Special Forces), big and tough but well educated—a master’s in Russian history from Georgetown. He’s been around the block. Yet he’s constantly taken aback by what’s happening in Moq’tar and by the U.S. Ambassador’s actions. For sure, Bobby’s no James Bond. Twice-divorced, he’s lonely, struggles with a family history revealed to him only when he turned forty and limps from an errant AK round taken in the knee in Northern Iraq. I was thrilled when Kirkus Reviews awarded Slick! a star as “a book of remarkable merit.”

4.      So is fiction-writing something relatively new to you? Oh no. My advertising career kept me busy, but years ago I concurrently wrote novels and short stories. I shared my stories with the San Francisco Writers Group, which was formed right after World War Two and still is ongoing, and had a few published in small magazines. For the novels, I had an agent in New York, but while my work generated some nice responses from editors, nothing sold. I stopped writing to devote my time to a growing family and a growing business.

5.      How does it feel to be a published author? Having been published through traditional channels and independently, I can say that major rewards exist besides money, which is hard to earn. For one, I’m always thrilled to hold one of my books in my hand and say, “I did this.” Any writer who brings a book to print—or to the digital screen—has accomplished something. And that star Kirkus Reviews gave Slick! represents hope for every writer who publishes independently. I’d love to have an agent and editor and be published by a major company, but even these hard-working pros miss some gems.

6.      Where do you see book-publishing heading and the author’s role in it? While my crystal ball needs polishing, we all know that the industry—and it is an industry—faces continual change. It’s very hard to get published the “standard” way, especially for novelists. But on the plus side, authors have real options. Print-on-demand offers an inexpensive way to produce print and digital books and make them available through major online channels. The old way of having books printed and storing them in your bedroom or garage never offered national and global distribution. And all-digital books enable authors to sell their work at incredibly low prices—as low as 99 cents—and keep the revenue. On the flip side, no matter how authors get published they have to do a lot of hard work to market their books. But online opportunities abound. The rules of the game keep shifting, but the opportunities keep growing. 

Interview With Author Samuel Sattin

1. What type of books do you write? Though I believe it would be difficult to pinpoint exactly what type of books I write (or plan to write), I will say that I hope to bring a more robust, character-oriented flavor to genre fiction, and, if it’s not to pretentious to say so, bring it into the literary mainstream.  I think this has been happening already with writers such as Mat Johnson, Lev Grossman, Victor LaValle, Jonathan Lethem, etc.  So I’m not really looking to reinvent the wheel.  If anything, I’m looking to explore, expand upon, and refine what others are doing, and hopefully, in the process, stumble upon something great. 

2. What is your latest or upcoming book about? Well, on the surface it’s about a boy whose father tries to make him into a superhero, vis-à-vis a mélange of what might be called ‘Manhood Tests’ combined with unhealthy amounts of a plutonium compound, and a dash of divine intervention.  But while the superhero narrative takes the stage somewhat in this book, The League of Somebodies is really about the ways in which knowledge and tradition are passed down through the generations.  It’s also about gender, and the dangers of tribalism.

3. What inspired you to write it? I won’t get too specific with this one, but I will say that family had a lot to do with it.  You really are your father’s son sometimes; you can’t escape who you are, even if you try.  But I also had a funny exchange with my wife one night, when we somehow imagined a horrifically hilarious image of a child being forced to run from a train by an angry Scotsman.  You might say it began there.

4. What did you do before you became an author? I traveled the globe for a bit, teaching ESL.  I lived in New York and went to grad school in California.  Odd jobs seem to be a big part of writing.  Whatever helps pays the bills.

5. How does it feel to be a published author? Better than not being one, that’s for sure!

6. Any advice for struggling writers? I know this is pretty much ‘the thing to say,’ but I’ll say it anyway: keep going.  You can’t really stop if you want to see your words in print.  The fact of the matter is that you have to convince people (a lot of people, hopefully) to pay 13.99 plus tax to spend 14 or so hours with characters, language, and plot that someone else other than them created.  You can’t delude yourself with the fact that thinking if you don’t write your book will still get done.  Books are long, and won’t finish themselves. You have to focus, maintain pace, read a lot, and get something on the page.  Serious writing is a job.  One shouldn’t forget that.

7. Where do you see book publishing heading? In a good direction, actually.  I don’t fret for the future of publishing.  If anything, I think more people are reading, and authors will have a big public thirst to quench.   But I do worry about monopolies, Amazon and the like, pushing small bookstores out of business.  Small bookstores are what helped me survive up until this point.  Losing them would be like losing a life raft out at sea. 

Interview With Author Kenneth Weene

1.      What type of books do you write? Primarily I write literary fiction, which means a great emphasis on the quality of language and depth of character. You can sample some of that writing at http://www.authorkenweene.com 

2.      What is your latest or upcoming book about? My most recently published book, Tales From the Dew Drop Inne tells the collective bittersweet stories of the people who make the place their home - people who have not fallen off the social ladder but who are hanging on desperately at the bottom.  Here's a link to the trailer.  http://mediasuite.multicastmedia.com/player.php?p=aat76pv9

3.      What inspired you to write it? I was working on another novel, The Stylite - a novel about love and sexuality, when I was asked to write a short story for a local magazine. Since the writing group that sponsored the magazine served as a creative home for me, I did a piece about a place that was a psychological home. Then a friend asked me to write a piece of flash for a contest. I figured I could use the same setting and characters. The story won the contest, and I was hooked. Once Dew Drop was finished, I went back to The Stylite, which is now in the hands of my agent.

4.      What did I do before I became an author? I trained as a shrink. For years I worked as a clinical psychologist in New York. I am also an ordained minister, so in Arizona, where I now live, I practice as a pastoral counselor.

5.      How does it feel to be a published author? I love writing and I love having my work out there for others to read; but the marketing end of the job is a bit wearing. I spend a lot of time doing interviews like this, appearing on radio shows, and just reaching out on the Internet. The up side is that I try to be an authentic person in the process and have therefore made a number of real friendships. People can find me on Twitter and Facebook. One of the neat things for me is that there are no others named Kenneth Weene, so finding me is very easy.

6.      Any advice for struggling writers? If you feel like writing is a struggle, you may want to ask yourself why. For me it is a joy, and I think it is for most of us who find out way. I think the most frequent reason people feel they are struggling is that they are so sure they know what they want to say; they aren't letting the writing flow but are rather trying to shape what comes off the tips of their fingers. It is like a river: first you need it to flow out and then you work at shaping it by building dams and levees, canals and even bridges. 

7.      Where do you see book publishing heading? I think that self-publishing will slowly diminish as readers find that too many self-published books are inadequately edited, proofed, etc. With the growth of e-readers, the big publishers will also diminish in importance. My best guess, the small houses like my current publisher, All Things That Matter Press, will become more a real factor.

Brian Feinblum’s views, opinions, and ideas expressed in this blog are his alone and not that of his employer, the nation’s largest book promoter. You can follow him on Twitter @theprexpert and email him at brianfeinblum@gmail.com. He feels more important when discussed in the third-person.

Batman Shows That One Good Story Is All You Need

The key to being a very good writer is to come up with a story that can be appreciated by the masses, one that covers familiar territory – life and death, love and love lost, good and evil, poverty and wealth. Once you have a successful book you can simply write it over and over again and your fans will suck them up.

One good book – and many sequels. We have seen it happen a million times. Look at the movies. Is every Woody Allen movie the same as the previous one? Did we need six Rocky films to champion the underdog’s passion and will to win? Isn’t every Harry Potter or Star Wars installment essentially the same as the original?

I saw the Dark Knight Rises less than 24 hours after learning of the Aurora tragedy. I made no connection to the movie and the mass murder. One didn’t cause the other. But as enjoyable as the latest installment was (if you can get past a masked hero and masked villain mumbling their lines incoherently at times), I knew that I had seen it before. It is the superhero formula –as well as the Batman franchise pattern – good triumphs over evil, often at a great price. We see a parallel between savior and criminal, and we feel how they each reacted to childhood events that would form whom they would inevitably become. Throw in some explosions and it’s a wrap.

So why are there few original stories out there?

1.      Money: Why screw with a formula that works commercially?\

2.      Time: It is harder, as time goes by, to say something that the generations before you have not yet said.

3.      Update: As time goes by, many stories are remade or retold so they can seem relevant and applicable to today’s world – and a new generation.

4.      Twists: The core of the story remains the same from book to book or movie to movie, but enough details change and character twists are mixed into make the story seem fresh.

5.      Maybe the greatest stories cannot be told for reasons we don’t yet know of or understand. For instance, maybe we just don’t know enough to understand what really happened 3,500 years, and thus we are limited in the stories we can tell about long-term history. Or maybe the government or some other force stopped a scientist from writing about something that would fascinate us but the story’s revelation could pose a danger to national security. Or those who could tell us an amazing story are dead, incapacitated, paid off to be quiet, or lack the ability to tell and bring their story to the public forum.

With technology, we have come up with new ways to present the same stories, that have already been told. Special effects, digital augmentation. 3-D movies and other technical manipulations allow for the retelling of tried and true stories on screen.

Maybe writers are not inspired, experienced, or educated enough to open a truly original story. But I cannot imagine that there are not some really good stories to be told. And when one is discovered, be prepared to read or view a series of sequels for decades to come.

Interview With Founder of SkillBites.net Judy Weintraub

1. What is SkillBites? SkillBites is a resource center where people can learn important lifestyle and business skills in a fraction of the time that it takes to read a book, take a class or attend a seminar on the topic.

2. Why did you create it? SkillBites was created with two objectives:  to provide a platform for experts to share their expertise; and to provide quick, affordable, easy to absorb and easy to execute resources for people to learn the skills they need to succeed.

3. How did you derive that name? The name is an offshoot of Sound bite – to connote brevity.

4. What is your background as it relates to launching this site? I am an attorney who has developed many presentations and training courses over the years, and was endeavoring to find a means of repurposing those materials to reach a wider audience.  I have some entrepreneurial experience, having started my law firm and a dispute resolution practice, as well as a consulting practice with a colleague.

5. Where do you see the future of publishing? With the low cost of online publishing, online self-publishing will continue to increase while traditional publishing will continue to decrease.

6. Any advice to a struggling writer looking to sell or promote his or her work? Fortunately, there are many benefits to being a published author besides the income from sales.  SkillBites provides its authors with a host of ideas for promoting their published status, as well as several ideas for promoting their work to gain sales, including email blasts, social networking, blogging, and Facebook ads.

For more information, please see www.SkillBites.net.

Interview With Author Cherie Foster Colburn

What is your newest book about? BLOOMIN' TALES is a children's book highlighting seven wildflower legends from seven cultures. It came out of my years working as a landscape designer with schools to create habitat gardens. I found the children (and their teachers) were more inclined to remember the names of the plants in their garden if they heard a story about it: how it got its name or why it looks like it does. Once I started collecting the legends, they multiplied like zucchini. I've gathered over 600 plant stories and they hail from every continent. Some cultures use storytelling more than others, but I believe we are all built with a desire to ferret out "the rest of the story" as Paul Harvey used to say, don't you?

What inspired you to write it? Sort of answered this above, huh? But the way it came to be a book is a little different....

When my editor heard me talking about the wildflower legends I'd gathered over the last 20 years, she went nuts. She's a huge fan of artist Cicely Mary Barker's Flower Fairies from the early 20th century and had an artist she'd worked with on some previous books that she felt would be perfect to illustrate my book.....and she WAS! Joy Hein is a Master Naturalist besides being a gifted painter. Joy showed me some work she'd done in various ethnic styles and I asked if she could do the same with the wildflower stories, using each specific culture's art style to influence the illustrations. She did an incredible job on BLOOMIN' TALES. One of my favorites is done as Mexican folk art. The colors are fantastic.  Joy's art really brought another dimension to all the stories.

What are the rewards/challenges to the writing process? One of my main challenges is being alone so much of the time. Many of my author friends enjoy a more solitary life, but I'm a people person. I do break up my day by going out and working in my own garden. Or checking emails or FaceBook, but that quickly turns into a black hole!  Writing for children - as opposed to working on my gardening books or articles for magazines - can be especially difficult. I turn each word over and over to be sure it is truly the one that's best for what I'm trying to say. The difference between the two audiences is a bit like planting a single plant and babying it versus broadcasting seeds and hoping they germinate. And while I also write poetry and am particular about cadence and rhythm with everything l write, I am even more conscientious when I know children will hear the words. I want them to fall in love with language and the music it makes.

One of my greatest joys is the opportunity to be a visiting author to schools. I still remember meeting my first REAL, LIVE author as a child and the impact it made on me to hear her speak about the mysterious muse that delivers the message and her responsibility to recite the message back as clearly as she could. I also enjoy talking to garden clubs and Master Gardener groups and writers' groups, but the questions in the Q&A afterwards are not nearly as entertaining as what the kids throw at me. I should be keeping a list!

Any advice for a struggling writer? Depends on WHY you are struggling. Is it because you want to be published, or because writing itself is a struggle? 

I came into book publishing as a garden writer for magazines. I sent a children's story I'd written about a grandfather and child building a night garden to a contest and it won. I began getting offers for publication. However, the story had come to me in a dream and I knew what the illustrations should be because I had experienced that garden: childlike and whimsical. And as an educator, it was also important to me that the book be more than just a good story so I asked for educational sidebars in it. When none of the publishers who contacted me were interested in the direction I wanted to go, I declined their contracts. Instead, I gave the story to the children's hospital at MD Anderson Cancer Center. The Children's Art Project director read it and wanted to make it into a book, my gardening sidebars included, with the children's artwork as centerpiece. The publisher contacted to produce OUR SHADOW GARDEN called me and asked what else I had.  I pitched several other book ideas. That's how I became an author. It's an atypical road, I know, and not something I could have planned. The fact I'd been published already in magazines and newspapers and had a gardening blog gave me a huge leg-up, I believe. The publisher knew I understood deadlines and had a following already. I also had those other book ideas lying in wait.  My advice? Be ready when opportunity passes close and grab it by the hair because it might not walk that way again.  OUR SHADOW GARDEN went on to win an award from the American Horticultural Society and Jr. Master Gardeners and has raised thousands of dollars for the hospital. 

Where do you see book publishing heading? At this very moment, I'm in Colorado as a student in the Denver Publishing Institute. It's been interesting to get perspectives from some giants in publishing. Without exception, each has spoken about the challenges and tremendous change facing the industry right now. I choose to see this as opportunity never before experienced in our lifetime. There are more outlets for writers to explore than ever. The trick is finding a niche that allows you to fill a void in the tapestry that no one else can fill. That means you must know what value your work brings and to whom. Becoming a talented writer is not accidental. It is the melding of the art, the craft, and experience. But even a gifted writer can have a hard time being recognized as such with all of the words bombarding us everyday from every direction. Set yourself apart by developing your writing and then getting the work in front of the right eyes, whether blog readers, editors, or your mother-in-law. Also, you need to decide who you are writing for and write for them, not yourself. If you write only for yourself, don't be surprised if you are the only person who reads your stuff. 

Interview With Author Erin Flynn

1.      What type of books do you write? My first book Mastering the Mommy Track: Juggling Career and Kids In Uncertain Times (Business Books, 2012) is non-fiction. I have written non-fiction articles for publications including careerbuilder.com, MSN Careers, Brandweek, Costco Connection, Opportunity World, Sales and Marketing Excellence, The New York Enterprise Report and Wealth Manager. In 2010, I wrote extensively about timely professional coaching topics for www.coachingcommons.org.

2.      What is your latest book about? Many working mothers today face great tension between their families and careers. They are more likely than men to feel pressed for time and conflicted about being away from young children while working. They are also more likely to seek out help or guidance.

Mastering the Mommy Track tells the stories of everyday working mothers, the challenges they have faced and lessons learned. It also offers solutions from experts on how mothers can overcome current issues in order to lead happy, healthy lives at home and work.

I hope career moms across the US and UK will read Mastering the Mommy Track and take away insight that will help them improve all aspects of their lives–both personal and work related. It is a juggling act to balance home and work duties, and for a lot of women in 2012, it’s a walk on a tightrope--a fear their families will never experience the rewards (vacation, travel, time off) they so rightfully deserve.

3.      What inspired you to write it? When I started writing this book, my daughters were ages three and one–challenging ages to say the least. I set out to talk to other moms who were struggling with the work-life balance as well as national experts who could offer solutions.

Mastering the Mommy Track is not a memoir, and I don’t share overly personal information about my family. I was fortunate to have no shortage of working moms who were willing to share their challenges during this down economy. My working mom contributors honestly shared their struggles and concerns. My expert contributors offered unique advice and knowledge. They helped me make this book a reality.
Research indicated no competitive books in this area, so I delved into it. I asked myself, “What are the 12 trigger areas that cause working mothers anxiety today?” These became my chapters. This was based on my personal experience, research, and feedback from friends and acquaintances.
I slotted the chapters into four core sections: (1) Home issues. (2) Health issues. (3) Parenting issues. And finally, (4) Work-Life issues. Then I arranged them so that the most fundamental issues came first: Mental health, communication, finances, and romance. These apply both to moms in committed relationships and those who are single.

4.      What did you do before you became an author? Since 2001, I have been promoting authors of new books and small businesses in all industries. I have expertise in successfully obtaining print, online and broadcast media placements for experts and authors. I have established ongoing partnerships with other public relations agencies and team with them on projects when my PR and writing skills are needed. From 2002 to 2005, I worked as an in-house consultant for Planned TV Arts in New York City, where I booked city tours, radio tours and speaking engagements for authors in addition to placing them in newspapers, magazines and online outlets.

5.      How does it feel to be a published author? It feels great, but now my to-do list has gotten quite long. Since I have a book PR background, I am promoting the book myself in addition to managing my PR business. In addition to review copy requests, outlets have asked for excerpts and Q&As. It’s very rewarding that there is media interest in this timely topic. When the book promotion is done, I will need a vacation or sabbatical.

6.      Any advice for struggling writers? Give yourself a schedule and stick with it like you would other deadlines. I wrote my book over the course of seven months on the weekends, early mornings and evenings. My business was my first priority, so I viewed this book as a hobby. My literary agent edited the chapters, and cheered me along throughout the whole process. An editor or cheerleader is important for you to stay focused and on course. 

7.      Where do you see book publishing heading? Unfortunately, as more consumers purchase books online, the list of independent bookstores is decreasing with many going out of business. It is hard for many independents to compete with Amazon and other online retailers. It was a sad day when Borders closed their doors. That was my neighborhood bookstore.  With the rise in e-books, there seems to be less of a demand for books in print. E-books will never completely replace the hardback or paperback, however.     

Brian Feinblum’s views, opinions, and ideas expressed in this blog are his alone and not that of his employer, the nation’s largest book promoter. You can follow him on Twitter @theprexpert and email him at brianfeinblum@gmail.com. He feels more important when discussed in the third-person.