Friday, March 31, 2017

Do Book Lovers Have More Sex?

Books can be about love, sex, romance, dating, and marriage – and about hate, rape, prostitution, cheating, divorce, and spousal abuse.  Whether fiction or non-fiction, books can instruct, inform, enlighten and entertain on so many matters.  They can even influence whom we date, sleep with or marry.

Ok, maybe that sounds like an overreach, but books can impact us in many ways.  For instance:

  • The values, events, or ideas expressed in books directly influence their readers and society at large.
  • The media reacts to what books say or depict and then its coverage spawns additional books and debates.
  • They instruct us on how to behave and treat others.
  • They reveal fantasies, preferences, desires, and insights into behaviors that can shape our interaction with others.

I met my wife because of books.

We both were working in the book publishing industry, back in 2000, and met at a Book Expo audiobook launch party for then gossip columnist Liz Smith.  This August we’ll celebrate 15 years of marriage.

Others have met or bonded over books.  They may have been in a book club or met at a bookstore, library, author event or a gathering of fans.  Maybe someone got turned on to hear that another reads the same type of books as he or she.  Perhaps, because they both love books they are also intellectuals and share other common views or interests such as in theater, the arts, or music.  Whatever it is, books are the glue to our world and they could be the spark to bring two strangers together.

But books also pose challenges.  People who read a lot may take in too much information and become crippled by it.  They will be book smart but not people savvy.  They will miss social cues. They may even be less available to date or meet others, simply because they all too often go to their books when they should be socializing.

For some book lovers, standards can be high.  When they engage others in conversation, they often struggle to find others who meet their expectations.  The same goes for texting, emailing or social media exchanges.

As a book reader, you may be sensitive to language and overly analytical when it comes to assessing communications from a love interest.

The bookish set may not be so physically active, so book lovers need to make sure the one they meet shares in the same level of activities.

Book nerds, however, are not some monolithic bloc.  Some may be intellectuals while others are party animals.  Some prefer isolation and quiet places while others are highly active.

Borrowing a book without asking or being tardy in its return can be a deal-breaker.  Not liking a recommended book from our significant other could also be problematic.  But when you share in the act of reading books you likely increase your chances for relationship success.  Book lovers also have to share in an appreciation for puns. 

Dating can’t be done by the book.  Nor can one act a certain way without expecting one to throw the book at them.  Don’t worry, some people can be read like a book. In fact, the relationship can be summarized like an open book.  If things don’t work out, you can always just book a trip and never return.  Sometimes the opening chapter to a relationship is a bit different than its surprise ending.  Most relationships can’t maintain a pace of being a page-turner, but one certainly can’t judge a reader by the book he or she is reading.  But a good relationship -- like a good book -- provides a great climax. 

So, book buyers beware.  The next book that you acquire may lead to a new relationship – or the sudden end to an existing one.

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Brian Feinblum’s views, opinions, and ideas expressed in this blog are his alone and not that of his employer. You can follow him on Twitter @theprexpert and email him at He feels more important when discussed in the third-person. This is copyrighted by BookMarketingBuzzBlog 2017©. Born and raised in Brooklyn, now resides in Westchester. Named one of the best book marketing blogs by Book Baby 

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