I have been a dad for over 17 years, and have come to see that all dads – regardless of age, race, faith, wealth, education, or geography – go through many of the same challenges when raising children today. Father’s Day is always a special day. As a kid, you honor the man who helps you navigate life. As the dad, you are celebrated for helping the next generation get a handle on an ever-challenging, increasingly complex world.
I stumbled upon a book of jokes that reminds me of the corny, word-play jokes. I used to see on Dixie cups, in knock-knock jokes, and on Bazooka gum wrappers. It’s called Dad Jokes: The Punny Edition, by Kit and Andrew Chilvers. What makes reading it special was the fart my 14-year-old daughter read it too.
To help you enjoy a little dad humor, I have shaved some of the jokes here:
“I married my wife for her looks… but not the one’s she’s been giving me lately.”
“What’s the longest word in the English language? Smiles. The first and last letters are a mile apart.”
"Light travels faster than sound. That’s why some people appear bright – until you hear them speak.”
“I just got offered a job teaching creative writing in prison. I spent all night thinking about the prose and cons.”
Times New Roman. Arial and Comic Sans walk into a bar. Before they can even order a drink, the bartender yells: ‘Get out – we don’t serve your type here.’”
“People overcome adversity all the time. I mean, just look at Beethoven. They told him he was deaf, but did he listen?”
“I went to a deli and said: ‘Hi, I’d like to buy a bagel with cream cheese.’ The kid behind the counter said: ‘Sorry, we only take cash or credit card.”
“Some people these days are too judgmental. I can tell just by looking at them.”
“I broke up with my girlfriend of five years because I found out she was a communist. I should have known – there were red flags everywhere.”
“My wife asked me today if I had seen the dog bowl. I said no. I didn’t even know he could.”
“My wife and I just celebrated ten years of happy marriage. It was, coincidentally, our 30th wedding anniversary.”
“I’ve got the body of a porn star. All my clothes say XXX.”
“What do you call a typo on a headstone? A grave mistake.”
“At my boss’s funeral, I leaned down and whispered to the coffin: ‘Who’s thinking outside the box now, Gary?’”
“My girlfriend told me that I’m pretty. Well, the whole sentence was, ‘You’re pretty annoying,’ but I try to focus on the positive things.”
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Brian Feinblum, the founder of this award-winning blog, can be reached at email@example.com He is available to help authors promote their story, sell their book, and grow their brand. He has 30 years of experience in successfully helping thousands of authors in all genres.
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About Brian Feinblum
Brian Feinblum should be followed on Twitter @theprexpert. This is copyrighted by BookMarketingBuzzBlog ©2022. Born and raised in Brooklyn, he now resides in Westchester with his wife, two kids, and Ferris, a black lab rescue dog. His writings are often featured in The Writer and IBPA’s The Independent. This blog, with over 4,000 posts over the past decade, was named one of the best book marketing blogs by BookBaby http://blog.bookbaby.com/2013/09/the-best-book-marketing-blogs and recognized by Feedspot in 2021 and 2018 as one of the top book marketing blogs. It was also named by WinningWriters.com as a "best resource.” For the past three decades, including 21 as the head of marketing for the nation’s largest book publicity firm, and two jobs at two independent presses, Brian has worked with many first-time, self-published, authors of all genres, right along with best-selling authors and celebrities such as: Dr. Ruth, Mark Victor Hansen, Joseph Finder, Katherine Spurway, Neil Rackham, Harvey Mackay, Ken Blanchard, Stephen Covey, Warren Adler, Cindy Adams, Susan RoAne, Jeff Foxworthy, Seth Godin, and Henry Winkler. He recently hosted a panel on book publicity for Book Expo America, and has spoken at ASJA, IBPA, Sarah Lawrence College, Nonfiction Writers Association, Cape Cod Writers Association, Willamette (Portland) Writers Association, and Connecticut Authors and Publishers Association. His letters-to-the-editor have been published in The Wall Street Journal, USA Today, New York Post, NY Daily News, Newsday, The Journal News (Westchester) and The Washington Post. He has been featured in The Sun Sentinel and Miami Herald. For more information, please consult: linkedin.com/in/brianfeinblum.
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