Thursday, March 21, 2019

Unfu*k Your Book Marketing

As adults we can get into a thinking rut, where we seem to get lost in negative or uninspiring thinking.  We know we need to do something – lose weight, change jobs, fix a relationship – but we can’t seem to get going in the right direction when it comes to marketing a book for most authors, writers need a boost or a swift kick in the butt to get them going in the right direction.  I came upon a book that could help redirect your focus – in life and probably for promoting your own book.

I just read Unfu*k Yourself:  Get Out of Your Head and Into Your Life by Gary John Bishop.  It is a New York Times Best-Seller.  I admit I was drawn to it by the catchy cover and provocative title, but the contents lived up to its name.

“It’s not that you have to find the answer,” he writes, “you are the answer.”

So what’s his secret sauce?

He talks about the conversations we have with ourselves daily.  Studies show we have over 50,000 thoughts a day. What do yours tell you to do, feel, or say?

“It all starts by making a conscious choice to talk in a way that’s helpful rather than harmful," the author writes. "By using the right kind of language and framing our problems in a more reality accessible light, we can quite literally change the way we see and interact with the world.”

He helps us understand “the complexity and power of self-talk and how to use it as a force for good in your life.”

Bishop encourages us to:
·         Engage with life and see a situation from a new perspective.
·         Control our destiny or let it control you.
·         Stop building things up  as bigger in our minds than they really are.
·         Cease from setting limits to our potential.
·         Achieve the things we set our mind to – we are wired to win.
·         Better understand our patterns of negative behavior in order to alter them.
·         Not stick to doing what we’re comfortable with because we need to stretch ourselves and try new things.
·         Embrace uncertainty and not worry about what we can’t control.
·         Grind it out, stake your claim, and hustle for what you want.  Sometimes you will need to make things happen.
·         Realize the only difference between you and the person who’s living the life you want is that they’re doing it. Stop wanting and start doing.

We often operate out of unrealistic perceptions of others – and unrealistic demands of ourselves.  We bundle our problems together to the point they overwhelm us, rather than try to tackle each one separately.  We can’t wait for the right moment, circumstance, or mood to strike – or wait for magic.  We simply must act and put our thoughts aside.  This is true in life – and in book marketing.

Bishop, implores us to adopt a mindset of “Expect nothing and accept everything.”  He believes this allows you to live in the moment and to act without worry about the future or of rejection.  He wants us to take ownership of our lives.

Some people don’t like motivational books or inspirational speeches, but I can tell you that Bishop just gives you the right amount of reality shock infused with some encouragement, talking to us in a very conversational way.  He made me feel, after reading his book, that more is possible in my life.

And more is possible with your book marketing.  Strategy, skills, and timing aside, the key to marketing your book effectively comes down to your attitude and state of mind.  It comes down to your devotion to taking action and changing with the times. 

Now go unfu*k yourself!

Here are some select excerpts:

Be Unwilling
Only when you’re unwilling to continue just simply existing, feeling unsatisfied and unfulfilled, will you make the effort necessary to make a change.  Only when you’re unwilling to put up with the bullshit any longer will you grab your shovel and star digging. At times there is no greater motivation to change than the unwillingness to do “this” any longer. Which one works for you in your life currently?  “I am willing” or “I am unwilling”?  Can you see how being unwilling can potentially be just as powerful as being willing?

Tackle Each Problem
Face your problems as they come, one by one; give them the attention they need and move on.  Bundling them all together into a morass of confusion and letting them overwhelm you just won’t help.  It talks precision, patience, and discipline of thought.  Work through each item pragmatically and with a solution in mind.  Remember, everything is solvable, and if you can’t see a solution, it only means you haven’t worked it out yet.

You are Relentless
When you’re not sure if you’re following the right path, when you’ve been knocked down a few too many times, it’s completely fine to get discouraged, hell, even defeated.  What’s not okay is to stop.

Because you can always lean on relentlessness.  When you have nothing else, you have relentlessness. When you have nothing else, you have relentlessness.

Rather than worrying about whether you should keep going or turn back, press in relentlessly.  Relentlessness has one direction, and that’s forward.  It only has one option, and that’s to keep the momentum going.

There is into giving up.  There is no quitting.  There is no changing of plans.

No Excuses
Take a long, hard look at your life.  Be honest with yourself, identify the behaviors that are holding you back. You need to use every waking hour of your life to further your cause, no excuses.  You’re not any different or any worse off than anyone else.  You’re not a fucking special case who needs different rules than everyone else.

You need to make a choice, right now.  You’re never going to change your life until you get rid of those things. No more excuses.

Two Steps to Freedom
If you’re truly ready to change your life, to take hold of that freedom you’ve been missing, there are two things you need to do.

1.      Stop doing what you’re currently doing.

Simple right?  Look at the things that are sourcing your problems, the habits that have put you in the situation you are in.

2.      Start taking the actions to propel you forward.

Again, pretty straightforward, right?  Changing your life isn’t just about NOT doing certain things.  You’ve also got to put in the work and build the positive habits that will pull you in the right direction.

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Brian Feinblum’s insightful views, provocative opinions, and interesting ideas expressed in this terrific blog are his alone and not that of his employer or anyone else. You can – and should -- follow him on Twitter @theprexpert and email him at He feels much more important when discussed in the third-person. This is copyrighted by BookMarketingBuzzBlog ©2019. Born and raised in Brooklyn, he now resides in Westchester. His writings are often featured in The Writer and IBPA’s Independent.  This was named one of the best book marketing blogs by Book Baby and recognized by Feedspot in 2018 as one of the top book marketing blogs. Also named by as a "best resource.” He recently hosted a panel on book publicity for Book Expo America.

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